For Your Eyes Only
by BritNP
Summary: Kurt and Jeff are texting during class to see who can make the other laugh first.


**A/N: I do not own Glee or any of its characters.**

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Kurt sighed, looking out the window as he absently twirled his pencil in his hand. Math was not only his least favorite subject, but probably his worst. The fact that his teacher was so monotonous only worsened things. It took everything he had not to fall asleep in class. Kurt jumped slightly as his phonevibrated in his pocket. Ignoring the stare from the girl next to him, he pulled out his phone and held it low so that he could read the text.

_Blaine __Bond __in__ "__Dr. __Cock__"_

_-Jeff_

Kurt had to bite his lip to avoid bursting into giggles. Only Jeff would send him such a text in the middle of class. Oh god, what if the teacher caught him and he had to read the text aloud. Or if the teacher took his phone and Jeff kept sending messages like that?

_Blaine __Bond __in__ "__From __Russia __with __Cock__"_

_-Kurt_

Kurt could only assume that they were going to keep texting the inappropriate Bond titles back and forth. Kurt shook his head, trying to remember exactly when the joke came about. Blaine's living room, wasn't it? They had been talking about how Blaine was sneaking about, Kurt thought. So they deemed him Blaine Bond. His phone vibrated again, and he pulled it out eagerly.

_Goldcock_

_-Jeff_

Kurt covered his mouth as his body shook with silent laughter. He could _not_laugh out loud. Whatever Jeff sent, he couldn't laugh out loud. Maybe this was a test of wills. To see who could crack first. Or who could get in trouble first. Oh god. What if he was sent to the principal over this?

_Thundercock_

_-Kurt_

Kurt closed his eyes, trying to relax himself. He opened them again and saw the girl next to him staring. She cocked her head to the side, questioning. He only shook his head, smiling, and she just shrugged and went back to writing notes. His phone vibrated again, and he hesitated before opening it.

_You __Only __Cock __Twice_

_-Jeff_

Kurt grinned. It was funny, but not nearly as funny as some of the others had been. He bit his lip, wondering if his next text was going to send Jeff into hysterics. If they were together, the two of them would have already been in hysterics at "Blaine Bond", and by now, they'd both be on the floor, clutching at their sides and gasping for air.

_Oh, __come __now. __You __can __do __better __than __that. __How __about__… __On __Her __Majesty__'__s __Secret __Cock?_

_-Kurt_

He nearly burst into laughter at his own text. He shut his eyes, biting his lip hard to avoid laughing. The girl next to him just looked at him quizzically. He grinned and handed her his phone, showing her the different texts. She was grinning and rolling her eyes. "Men!" she mouthed to Kurt. He just grinned and tapped his pencil against his notebook, waiting for the next text. He grinned as soon as he felt the vibration against his leg.

_Oh__my__god. __I __couldn__'__t__… __I __started __laughing __out __loud __and __had __to __leave __class._

_-Jeff_

Kurt stood and threw his hands up in the air, yelling, "I win!" The girl in the seat next to him only burst into hysterical laughter and the rest of the class was giving him odd looks. Kurt turned red, lowering his arms. "At… understanding. I get what we're doing." Kurt sat down quickly, ducking his head down.

"Yes, that's… wonderful, Mr. Hummel. Would you care to learn the rest of the lesson?" Kurt only gave a small squeak in answer and started scribbling furiously in his notebook. The girl next to him was red in the face as she stole glances at Kurt. She couldn't stop laughing.

_Yes, __well__… __I __just __embarrassed __myself __in __front __of __an __entire __class._

_-Kurt_

Kurt shook his head in embarrassment as he half-listened to the teacher, doodling in his notebook. Oh, this was going to be a fun one to explain to Mercedes later. She would positively die from laughter, and she would definitely delight in Kurt's embarrassment. Kurt tugged his phone out of his pocket as it went off again.

_Explain __over __coffee __after __school?_

_-Jeff_

Kurt grinned and rushed to send an answer as the bell rang for the next class.

_Okay, __but __you__'__re __buying._

_-Kurt_

The next text came right before he entered his English class.

_Well, __of __course. __A __gentleman __always __pays._

_-Jeff_

Kurt sighed happily, his grin so wide that it physically hurt. He sat down at his desk and unknowingly pulled out his math notebook. When he opened up, he heard a whistle from next to him. He looked to see Puck leaning over his shoulder, looking at his notebook. Kurt looked down and realized that all over his notebook, he had drawn cock versions of "Blaine Bond".

"A little obsessed?" Puck laughed and sat down next to Kurt.

Kurt let his body fall forward and his head hit the desk with a loud _thump_, as he muttered, "Kill me now." Jeff would just _die _when Kurt told him all about this one. Jeff might have laughed first, but he probably hadn't suffered so much embarrassment. Guess the joke was on Kurt.


End file.
